Forgiving Wound

Your words they cut me like a jaggered razor,
You declare your never dying affection,
But the utterances you project,
Have left my soul in anguished perplexion.

Love is not love if it's bound by a promise,
It cannot be a forced decision,
Trust me, understand how I am,
I use the most careful precision.

Have faith in me, have faith in yourself,
Believe me when I say that you taught me well.
The separation and conflict amongst us two,
It hurts, it destroys, it's a window into Hell.

You who knew me best became my Judas Iscariot,
With words filled with malice a proclamation announced.
With a pervasive manner you cursed my being,
From love to hate your curse was pronounced.

I want no part in the life you demand,
To forgive is to let go, forget the wrongdoings,
Become unbitter and pursue the unfamiliar,
My endeavors are fulfilled and now time alone will show.

Your way is not the way.
Other options still exist.
I have grown and matured, My will is made strong,
I know to persist.

The void you have cut out has wrecked my soul,
What can I do more to remove this heart ache?
Will God open up, will He hear me once more?
Will He bring great aid for my souls sake?

I need You God, I need Your mercies,
Abba, Daddy, heal the wounds that confound me.
My Judas had so much I am left tied in a knot,
The bindings so tight only You can set me free.

Pick me up, make me move on.
My head is pounding, a sure sign of the strumbling mind.
My heart's been removed for now,
Apathy breathes in me with no desire to find.

Life is far from the end,
I will continue and I will prevail.
Tears will fall and nights will have sorrows,
With an unbeatable pursuit I shall avail.

I love you, I always will,
But for my sake I look ahead.
Never to forget you do I leave with scars,
Those wounds to remember the times that I bled.

Should you change and accept,
I will stand by you again.
We will pick up where we left,
A new start and alas we will begin.

- C. T. Warren